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Looking for advice, stories, experiences ..

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Looking for advice, stories, experiences ..

Message par unknxwn le Ven 25 Mai 2018 - 10:07

( bon, je m'exprime pas bien en francais et j'éspère que ca posera pas de problème si j'écris en anglais )
Hi, I'm using this post to partially vent, because it's not something I get to talk about, and to also find out how other people with similar experiences have dealt with them. So feel free to share whatever you have in mind.
Basically, I'm very closeted , this statement is debatable; I might give hints then back-off , regret everything and throw some homophobic comments (not proud of this). The thing is, I can't really stand this situation.. I constantly fight the urge to joke about my queerness or fight someone who says something offensive. Also, people I hang out around are all straight, mostly homophobic.. That's really uncomfortable, I'm never myself around them and I'm almost never happy. But in order to meet other gay people (kinda lost touch with every queer person i knew lmao) I must be a little more open, that's the major issue.
I wasn't always like this. In fact, I was the exact opposite. But a bad experience in high school lead to me becoming more and more closeted. I wanted to fly under the radar for sometime until it all calms down . I thought it would be a temporary thing, now I still can't get out of this deep pit of fear. I don't want to run the streets shouting that I'm gay to the world, I just want to be able to relax and allow myself to be me again. I'm tired of calculating every word, every move to not give people the benefit of the doubt (I sometimes fail lmao).
This sounds like a diary entry, sorry about that. Although I tried, I don't think I worded my feelings right. But yeah, can't wait to read your takes on this (that if i get any replies at all lmao)


Think about how it affects you, then see if ruining someone's happiness is really worth it.
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Re: Looking for advice, stories, experiences ..

Message par Orchi le Sam 26 Mai 2018 - 11:17

Quite a moving story :c

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Re: Looking for advice, stories, experiences ..

Message par Adam_Gaga le Dim 27 Mai 2018 - 14:40

Bonsoir, j'ai lu ton poste et j'aimerais y répondre sauf que ma réponse sera en français ... ça ne te gêne pas ?
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Re: Looking for advice, stories, experiences ..

Message par unknxwn le Lun 28 Mai 2018 - 2:57

Adam , ca me gêne pas du tout Very Happy je comprends le francais, c'est juste que je m'exprime pas bien avec


Think about how it affects you, then see if ruining someone's happiness is really worth it.
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Re: Looking for advice, stories, experiences ..

Message par Abysse le Lun 28 Mai 2018 - 5:45

T'es encore young ! With time tu vas plus te lâcher et t assumer ???????????????? ! Don't worry just be happy Smile)
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Re: Looking for advice, stories, experiences ..

Message par unknxwn le Lun 28 Mai 2018 - 6:15

aww merci Abysse Very Happy I really hope so !!


Think about how it affects you, then see if ruining someone's happiness is really worth it.
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Re: Looking for advice, stories, experiences ..

Message par Adam_Gaga le Lun 28 Mai 2018 - 12:55

Tu sais nous sommes tous passés par des moments où nous avons choisi de nous faire passer pour ce que nous ne sommes pas. Le fait d'être consciente que ce mécanisme de défense te détruit plus qu'il te préserve est déjà un pas vers le changement, ça va être dur mais pas impossible.

Quel genre de mauvaise expérience ? ces amis hétéros et presque homophobes sont-ils tes collègues ? a ton avis comment peux-tu te débarrasser de cette "fausse" carapace ?

excuse mes innombrables questions et je m'excuse si je suis indiscret x)
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Re: Looking for advice, stories, experiences ..

Message par unknxwn le Mar 29 Mai 2018 - 2:39

I really appreciate this , Adam, thank you. And uhm, bad experience as in ive been outed and bullied. No, they're not colleagues, we just go to the same uni (i have an idea on why you asked that, i can just say that those people I mentioned are probably going to be around for quite a long time) . It's not gonna be hard to drift apart from them though, it's just that I have a hard time being alone and getting new accepting (or even queer) friends is gonna require me to be a bit open..so I'm kind of settling for the moment.


Think about how it affects you, then see if ruining someone's happiness is really worth it.
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Re: Looking for advice, stories, experiences ..

Message par sadliljazz le Jeu 31 Mai 2018 - 11:33

Hey, I'm also a lesbian living in Morocco, it's actually really rare to find lesbians on here who speak english as I don't even like expressing myself in french. Anyways I'm LOVING the hayley profile haha. anyone with a hayley profile is gay. I wonder if you like other gay related things because I feel so alone in this. It sucks living here and feeling this shitty all the time lmao but I'm glad I found people like you on here. If you want to talk more, do ask and I'll give you my number or social media. cheers
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Re: Looking for advice, stories, experiences ..

Message par Yorkie le Jeu 31 Mai 2018 - 14:07

sadliljazz a écrit:Hey, I'm also a lesbian living in Morocco, it's actually really rare to find lesbians on here who speak english as I don't even like expressing myself in french. Anyways I'm LOVING the hayley profile haha. anyone with a hayley profile is gay. I wonder if you like other gay related things because I feel so alone in this. It sucks living here and feeling this shitty all the time lmao but I'm glad I found people like you on here. If you want to talk more, do ask and I'll give you my number or social media. cheers
It's really not that rare, it is "LGBTmaroc" so most of us here live in Morocco, also if you read the posts you'll find a lot of people talk in English. You're not alone in what you like or what you do you just don't know many people yet.
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Re: Looking for advice, stories, experiences ..

Message par sadliljazz le Jeu 31 Mai 2018 - 14:31

Not really. I've always visited this forum, and the people in it are almost always speaking in french and even those people aren't online half of the goddamn time. I've visited other sites as well, same issue. Plus it doesn't help how most of the people are way old, and are looking for... well hookups, if not relationships. Like common, how many people do you know outside of this forum in real life that are lgbt? Probably close to none. Unless you live in a rich and popular area then probably, but for the most part The lgbt community in Morocco is very... distant. It's sad in a way. I find it so hard to find lgbt people in morocco whether it's on here or in real lide. It has nothing to do with me not knowing people, it's more like the lgbt community is dead in morocco. Isn't that the case in every arab country?
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Re: Looking for advice, stories, experiences ..

Message par Yorkie le Ven 1 Juin 2018 - 9:05

sadliljazz a écrit:Not really. I've always visited this forum, and the people in it are almost always speaking in french and even those people aren't online half of the goddamn time. I've visited other sites as well, same issue. Plus it doesn't help how most of the people are way old, and are looking for... well hookups, if not relationships. Like common, how many people do you know outside of this forum in real life that are lgbt? Probably close to none. Unless you live in a rich and popular area then probably, but for the most part The lgbt community in Morocco is very... distant. It's sad in a way. I find it so hard to find lgbt people in morocco whether it's on here or in real lide. It has nothing to do with me not knowing people, it's more like the lgbt community is dead in morocco. Isn't that the case in every arab country?
not really, I know a lot of people from this Forum in real life, maybe it has to do with the fact that I've been a member since the good old days where it was always crowded, but still, even in real life the LGBT's have a tendency to hang out with each other at specific places
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Re: Looking for advice, stories, experiences ..

Message par attenuer le Sam 2 Juin 2018 - 14:44

I've never come out to my family (and may never come out to them) but I started coming out to people back in high school. Eventually a few homophobic friends distanced themselves, but I moved on and found better people to associate with. It sounds like you're closeted in fear of being rejected but I promise once you're 100% comfortable with yourself and your own sexuality, telling people will be easier.

I think it's uncomplicated to be out in a society where there's no chance of persecution. Obviously in Morocco it's a different story - but if you're in the U.S. try to take advantage of the fact that you can put yourself out there and
not get arrested.

When I'm visiting Morocco I feel like I'm paranoid and constantly looking over my shoulder but I have LGBT friends there that are forced to live closeted indefinitely - so it would be insensitive of me to complain.

Good luck with everything and just be yourself Smile


Love takes off masks that we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within - James Baldwin
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Re: Looking for advice, stories, experiences ..

Message par ghisou22 le Dim 3 Juin 2018 - 19:25

Hey everybody! It’s been a very long time I haven’t been connected here. I’m glad to find that people still in here!! About your experience... I think you should work first on your own feelings about your sexuality... when you’ll be ok with that you’ll be more confident and more independent. You’ll be able to choose your friends and to select your environment step by step until you find the right one. Personally, I was bullied for something else in high school and when I went to college I started to think about all what is not going right with me... and started to assume it. It was the same thing for my sexual orientation and now I accept it and I’m ok with that. I’ll never come out because of our society but I have friends who I know if I do they would accept it easily (maybe they already know)... so... be ok with yourself. The other things will be ok and you’ll manage it don’t worry. Just be ok with yourself

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Re: Looking for advice, stories, experiences ..

Message par unknxwn le Mar 5 Juin 2018 - 4:13

hey guys , thank you all for sharing your stories. I'll definitely start working on being more comfortable when it comes to my sexuality. wish you all the best


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Re: Looking for advice, stories, experiences ..

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